Even though nothing was resolved in my previous post, writing it was cathartic, and today, I felt, yes, amazing.
I decided to run with the concept of “ridiculously self-indulgent” (since the phrase keeps appearing in my self-talk). I challenged myself to come up with 20 “ridiculously self-indulgent” things I wanted to do . . . and then do them!
That actually felt doable — too easy — so I made it 27, and that felt suitably hard, so I began.
(I’m sure there’s an exercise for something similar in The Artist’s Way, even though I didn’t look for it in the book, hence the tag.)
This exercise was so energizing, and thought-provoking and deeply informative, that I kept going after 27.
1. Kona coffee, once in a while.
2. Crème brulee, just because.
3. Cake (or something cake-like) for my birthday.
4. Taking myself to Sunday brunch at [local posh restaurant].
5. Petting zoo.
6. Go to a Wonderbunny show.
7. Return to [Place L in Europe], and spend time alone there.
8. Take Amtrak across country.
9. Make a quilt/coverlet for my bed … in my studio (?).
10. Find an artist/writer residency that’s a +/- “perfect fit” for me, and apply for it. Tout my amazingness.
11. Commission a dress or other dressy outfit from an exuberant, funky designer who is open to nonbinary presentation. Go for something experimental & truly innovative, but also. . . joyful and fun and in pretty colors.
12. Wear this garment/outfit in public.
13. Write to Mary Oliver.
14. Write a book. Illustrate it. Design it. Create it.
15. PLAY with my ideas of written-visual-sculptural poems.
16. Create a garment of my own design “from scratch”.
17. Wear it, in public and in private.
18. Create jewelry for myself out of fibers. Wear it.
19. Immerse myself in a Spanish-speaking environment. [Get over my embarrassment at my dorky accent, and inability to roll my r’s.]
20. Go swimming.
21. Find a bathing suit that “fits” my nonbinary sensibilities and aesthetic.
22. Spend at least 3 days, if not a week, at 10 major waterbodies in the U.S. Get to know them. Write.
23. Visit Iran.
24. Visit Turkey.
25. Visit North Africa.
26. Learn to speak Swahili.
27. Figure out a way to design patterned fabric that doesn’t have predictable repeats.
28. Build a bird’s nest.
29. Make friends with a hive of bees.
30. Hike in the Sandias.
31. Visit Rattlesnake Museum in Albuquerque.
32. Go back to the Coromandel Peninsula.
33. Find someplace that makes delicious French toast, and go there for breakfast sometimes.
34. Take a class (?) in smells. Write.
35. Really delve into my synesthesia; then write about it.
36. Get paid for something I wrote.
37. Apply to the AE writing fellowship.
38. Apply to the YW writing fellowship.
39. Celebrate my 50th birthday in Andalucía.
40. Write magical realism fiction.
41. Be a tree. Write about it.
42. Flirt with somebody cute.
43. Crochet/knit something sculptural.
44. Felt something I knitted/crocheted; make a garment out of it.
45. Cinnamon. Orange. Lime. Plaid.
46. Rent a ridiculously fast car and DRIVE IT!
48. Wear flowers in my hair.
49. Visit Madagascar.
50. Is there some way to un-knit my old socks, and re-knit them, so they actually fit my feet better and last longer?
51. Write to Favorite Catalog 1 about Crazy Idea 1.
52. Write to Other Catalog 2 about Crazy Idea 2.
53. Contact [Person] about getting together in NYC.
54. Track down and watch movie “Auntie Mame”.
55. Track down and watch documentary about that woman Holocaust survivor, who died recently.
I do not understand what some of these items are referring to.
I’m not sure how I might accomplish others.